We all have those unreasonable customers. Ones that want to bring an item back months after they bought it, not in resell-able condition. Ones that demand money back without a receipt or they will flame you on Yelp. Ones that want you to do something that your stated policies say you don't clearly do.
You could take a page from Best Buy and fire those customers. You could be like the Soup Nazi on The Seinfeld Show - no soup for you!!
Here is another approach I want you to consider.
Kill 'em with kindness. Break your policy and do what they ask. Bend the rules and give them what they want. Do it with a HUGE smile on your face, sincerity in your heart, and genuine concern for their needs.
"I'm really sorry that item didn't work out for you. Yes, I can see why your husband would cut it in half. We'd be happy to take it back. Would you like to pick something else out? Maybe I can offer a couple suggestions of items that might work better? No? Okay, here is a refund. Let me know if there is anything we can do to help you out in the future."
It might sting a little bit. You might lose some money on that particular transaction. But don't be penny-wise and pound-foolish.
When you kill these customers with kindness, a few things could happen.
They might not notice and continue to be a thorn in your side.
But your other customers noticed. They didn't get the whole story of what was going on with the customer. They didn't see how unreasonable she was. But they did see how you reacted. They saw how you took incredible care of the customer. They saw how you had the customer's back. They noticed how you were calm and friendly and respectful and helpful and caring.
They might become one of your best customers ever.
I could regale you with many tales of unhappy customers we have turned into mega profit machines because we bent the rules a little. Heck, you can regale me with many of the same stories. In fact, retail is the only place I have actually seen true alchemy - turning lead weight into gold.
At a time when we are all screaming about how to draw more traffic, maybe firing our current customers isn't always the best tactic.
As one anonymously brilliant person said... Your customers will get better when you do.
PS Never let short-term profits get in the way of your long-term goals. This strategy may "lose" you a battle or two, but you'll win the war. Yes, it requires patience. Yes, it requires eating a little crow (but crow sprinkled with a helping of cold hard cash can be rather tasty sometimes). Yes, there will be customers who make you duck into your office for a few minutes. Yes, they got more than they deserved. Isn't than the hallmark of incredible over-the-top customer service?